Thursday, November 11, 2010

Stop The Insanity!!!

Do you remember the feeling of being stuck in the house for a week because it was winter time in Oklahoma and the roads were all FrOzEn? Cabin Fever!!!! And, if you have a sibling...do you remember what happened between the two of you? Fight and bicker, fight and bicker, nag, nag, nag, until your parents separated you. Oh, yes, and remember that your parents couldn't go anywhere either. So ALL of you were STUCK in the house ALL the time!!! It always resulted in INSANITY!!!

That is what home schooling was like for us. Insanity. We wanted to see if we could be successful. We tried it. It didn't work. First we started with unschooling. The children don't seem to have that inner desire to learn. They would rather sit and stare at a wall all day long instead of learn. Yes, they did just that. For days. With no signs of discontent at all. We tried providing learning material and schedules and still allowing them the freedom of choosing what they would learn and when they would sit down and do it. They could use their MP3 players. They could study outside. They could learn at the park. They could sit in the huge spa like bathtub surrounded by pillows and dolls. They. Didn't. Want. To. Learn.

We decided to try OKVA. The idea was that we would just be coaches. The responsibility of assignments and workload would rest on the relationship between the kids and the teachers they were assigned. Within the first two weeks, both children. Were. Failing. Their. Classes. 


Really.

So Tommy and I were spending all of our time chasing Logan, redirecting the kids to their school work, and diffusing attitude problems and temper tantrums. I wasn't able to get any of my college studying done until after the kids went to sleep. I would stay up until around 1:30 a.m. and then get back up around 4:30 a.m. just so I could spend some amount of time on my own school work. 


 And this was always the result. 








So we figured something needed to change. We tried to reason with them. We tried to explain to them that their behavior was a HUGE problem. We pleaded with them. They would rather sit within the confines of a brick and mortar school. 

They have been back in school since Monday. One week almost finished and we are back to the same issues that led us to home school in the first place. Chris is coming home every day claiming he is homework free. Kayla is begging us for help with her homework yet fighting us tooth and nail about it. I feel like I have failed them. I know that everyone will give me kudos for the attempt and admiration for sticking with it as long as we did. I. Will. Always. Feel. Like. I. Failed. Them. Nothing will change that.

This is what has changed:


6 hours a day I can relax and concentrate on my school work.
I am at peace with that. I know that I will receive criticism from the people on the other side of the fence. I can deal with that. The fact is, my kids want to be "normal", and they will go to great lengths to be considered such. It doesn't make any sense to me. The old saying "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em" comes into play. 

I hope that this is where God wants us to be. I hope that my kiddos thrive and blossom into the outstanding and superb people that I know they are. I hope that we will continue to grow and develop as a family and change as we see the need. I hope that you are willing to do the same.

3 comments:

Jennifer Murray said...

You haven't failed at anything unless you have stopped trying. And from what I see and hear, you are still trying. You are trying to find what works for your kids. That makes you an excellent mother in my eyes. I *think* I may have found a solution to Morgan's issue with homework. I'll tell you about it next time I see you, it's too long to post here.

Alicia said...

I'm with Jen on this one ... you would have failed your children had you NOT given the opportunity to try other methods of learning. THEY made a choice to not take part in that opportunity thus they're back on public school. That doesn't mean public school is a punishment, it just means they'll have more restrictions/less freedoms.

The deal is, you are their mother-no matter HOW MANY TIMES you try to convey a message to them, they're just at an age where everything you say makes no sense, and they really kind of (on the outside anyway) think you're dumb. They KNOW you're right in nearly most everything you try to teach them but they're too stubborn to recognize it now. No amount of struggle you give them would win them toward your position as an educator SO .... let the school do it. Let there be consequences they WILL listen to (i.e. not getting to participate in band due to failing grades for not turning in homework).

You did your best Sabrina & that's ALL you CAN do! I'm proud of you & I think you're an outstanding mother!

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry this wasn't what you'd expected it to be Sabrina. I hope everything works out well in school.